I was trying to catch 40 winks after “Arthur” this afternoon. Instead of watching “Cyberchase”, Rachel decided to sing me to sleep. One song contained this lyrical gem
“Even though your sister farts all day and all night,
She’s still beautiful.”
Another Confirmation of My Personality
Your Score: Borefest – ISTJ
13% Extraversion, 40% Intuition, 60% Thinking, 86% Judging
One word. Boring. Sums you up to a tee. You’re responsible, trustworthy, serious and down to earth. Boring. Boring. Boring.
You play by the rules. You follow tradition. You encourage structure.
You insist that EVERYBODY do EVERYTHING by the book. Seriously, is there even an ounce of imagination in that little brain of yours? I mean, what’s the point of imagination, right? It has no practical value…
As far as you’re concerned, abstract theories can go screw themselves. You just want the facts, all the facts and nothing but the facts.
Oh. And you’re a perfectionist. About everything. You know that the previous sentence was gramattically incorrect and that “gramattically” was spelt wrong. Your financial records are correct to 25 decimal places and your bedroom is in pristine condition. In fact, you even don’t sleep on your bed anymore for fear that you might crease the sheets.
Thankfully, you don’t have anyone else to share the bed with, because you’re uncomfortable expressing affection and emotion to others. Too bad.
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If you want to learn more about your personality type in a slightly less negative way, check out this.
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The other personality types are as follows…
Loner – Introverted Sensing Feeling Perceiving
Pushover – Introverted Sensing Feeling Judging
Criminal – Introverted Sensing Thinking Perceiving
Almost Perfect – Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving
Freak – Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging
Loser – Introverted iNtuitive Thinking Perceiving
Crackpot – Introverted iNtuitive Thinking Judging
Clown – Extraverted Sensing Feeling Perceiving
Sap – Extraverted Sensing Feeling Judging
Commander – Extraverted Sensing Thinking Perceiving
Do Gooder – Extraverted Sensing Thinking Judging
Scumbag – Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving
Busybody – Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging
Prick – Extraverted iNtuitive Thinking Perceiving
Dictator – Extraverted iNtuitive Thinking Judging
| Link: The Brutally Honest Personality Test written by UltimateMaster on OkCupid, home of the The Dating Persona Test |
Rachel’s Come to Jesus Talk
Ever since Sarah became a hug and kiss monkey, Rachel has gotten progressively moody. I know she is jealous, but it’s not like I’m ignoring her. Rachel is mad that Sarah is getting any attention.
Tonight, as I sent both girls to bed before I had a class meeting, I wanted to give them both a hug and a kiss goodnight. Sarah was all over that, but Rachel just glowered at Sarah and told me she didn’t want to hug and kiss me.
I told her she was welcome to take her snotty attitude and go to bed.
Two minutes later, she’s at the bottom of the stairs, asking me repeatedly if I want a hug and a kiss now. I tell her to march her butt upstairs to me NOW.
I proceeded to calmly, but firmly, read her The Riot Act (no, not the actual Riot Act). I informed her that she should not treat people she says she loves like they are dirt on the ground. I was tired of her meanness, jealousy, and attitude toward me.
Eye to eye, nose to nose. I never raised my voice.
After standing a minute with a quivering lip, she threw herself in my arms, and sobbed her “I’m sorry”.
I hope she drops this attitude. I hope I finally got through to her.
Sydney, I Don’t Think We’re In St. Paul Anymore
One evening in early May, I went to bed in St. Paul, Minnesota. The next day, I woke up in Chicago, Illinois. I swear. The wind hasn’t stopped blowing here since May 10th. Some days, I think the wind is going to take one of my kids up-up-and-away, a la’ the Flying Nun. Even without the funny hat.
Rachel, Sydney, and I are walking sinuses. I think each of us has gained 10 lbs in the last week, all of it concrete crap in our heads.
All this wind inspires some folks to tell the old joke:
Q: Why has it become so windy in Minnesota?
A: Because the Dakotas blow and Wisconsin sucks.
Of course, that joke goes over really well with the folks in the office from Wisconsin.
Don’t have much else to say, just need to complain.
Meet the Grandkids
My daughters Sarah and Rachel have completed their latest adoptions. I thought everyone might like to see a family photo.
Here they are, basically left to right:
My daughter Sarah with her daughters Elizabeth (in pink, adopted from Maoming as an infant) and LuJing (in black silk pajamas, adopted from Maoming as a 6-year old)
Then there are my other granddaughters Sally AnaMing (in stripes, adopted as a 4 year old from Fengcheng) and Baby Baluga (in purple, adopted as an infant from Fengcheng). Next to them on the right is their proud mother (and my daughter) Rachel.
Sarah and Rachel were able to adopt as single mothers — they made it through before the recent program changes in China. I’m happy to say all my grandchildren made a wonderful adjustment to life in the U.S.A. The humidity we’ve had in the last couple of days does remind them of China, and makes the older ones miss their former homes just a wee bit. But they are happy to have a family.
They’re a good looking bunch, aren’t they? I’m proud as can be.
One Page Wonder Technique
About six months ago, I found a card technique on the web called “One Page Wonder”. You stamp up one piece of cardstock and cut it to a specific formula. Then you add other cardstock and embellishments to finish 10 cards.
I finally got some extended free-time to do the technique. It’s not that it’s time consuming, it just takes me a while to come up with the cardstock colors, stamps, and embellishments.
Stop Me Before I Buyout Office Max…
Earlier this week, I spent four wonderful days communing with my professional tribe. The Society for Technical Communication held its annual conference in Minneapolis. It was wonderful sitting in sessions and learning something related to my profession. It was wonderful meeting other technical communicators. It was AWESOME meeting my fellow Lone Writers.
But all this talk of writing, design, and technology has left me with a terrible urge to go to Office Max and spend $$$. Oh, the lovely pens! Oh, the lovely electronics! Oh, the stacks of papers! It’s all calling my name, calling my credit card number, urging me to hop in the car and go north to the Midway Center.
It’s a Siren call even stronger than chocolate. Toner cartridges, printer paper, office supplies, markers, erasers… don’t they have a 12-step group for this? It’s agony, I tell you. Pure Hell.
If you hear a scream of anguish coming from the direction of St. Paul, know that it’s just me jonesing for Office Max.
Random Memories of K.V.
The man who fed my adodescent imagination has died.
In 1975, if you asked me who my favorite writers were, I would have said, “Kurt Vonnegut and John Steinbeck”.
Many of the hours I spent holed up in my bedroom were devoted to devouring anything written by Kurt Vonnegut or John Steinbeck. I loved Steinbeck’s vivid writing, but I also knew that after I read his books, that’s all there was. Steinbeck was dead.
On the other hand, Kurt Vonnegut was very much alive and causing trouble. His quirky style, the bizzarre worlds he created — there would be more. All I had to do was to wait for the next book, or the next essay.
Somewhere, in my stash of stuff, I have a copy of his essay on how to write. I remember when the essay first came out, one of a series of articles by famous people written for some paper company, if I remember correctly. The advice was so logical, and so full of his own style. It left an impression.
Years later as I was growing into the role of technical writer, I discovered that Vonnegut had been a technical writer at General Electric. And hated it. On my worst professional days, I still think, “Vonnegut did this to make a living for a while. I can do it too.”
While I was waiting for Rachel’s referral in 2001-2002, this quote from God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater would often pop into my mind:
“Hello, Babies. Welcome to earth. It’s hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It’s round and wet and crowded. At the outside, babies, you have about a hundred years here. There’s only one rule that I know of —
God damn it, babies, you’ve got to be kind. “
It always gave me comfort, in that if I could teach my children to be kind, they would be good people.
Thanks for the childrearing advice, Mr. Vonnegut, and for the entertainment and inspiration. You and Steinbeck are still my favorite writers.
Ingredients
The pet food recalls have been keeping me on the edge the last two weeks. Seems like everyday there is a new twist or addition to the recall. Yesterday as I was trying to take a nap, they announced another type of food that has been recalled because of the wheat gluten issue. So much for the nap.
There are two things that have kept me from going absolutely nuts — that it is primarily wet foods that are being recalled and that the food all has wheat gluten in it.
I never thought I would say this, but, THANK GOODNESS FOR LADDIE’S WHEAT ALLERGY. Because one of the few dry brands recalled is one that I used to feed the dogs before Laddie has all his digestive issues.
Needless to say, by now I have memorized all the ingredients in their current vet-prescription kibble. It’s enough to give me a migraine.
And speaking of migraines, yesterday we discovered yet another favorite expensive-as-hell ice cream has that evil ingredient in it — carrageenan. It’s evil because it’s an MSG derivative and it gives me migraines — and makes Sarah have breathing issues.
This is particularly bad, as this is a local ice cream maker that has started selling it in stores. An ice cream shop we frequent. Sarah burst into tears when I showed her the ingredients. I promised her to write to the ice cream shop and ask if they have this in all their ice cream now.
My guess is that they do. In that case, I’ll be looking for an ice cream maker — and recipes.
Tulips and Tornadoes and Trying
The weather’s been a bit unusual in the last week. When I woke up this morning and took out the dogs, it felt clammy outside. It was 74 degrees in my backyard this afternoon. It felt more like a late May day than late March. The last time the weather felt like this in March was the year St. Peter got flattened by a tornado.
When you get heat, wind, and humidity together with a cold front, you get conditions that are ripe for a tornado. Even if it is March — when we should be buried in snow. We had a tornado watch this afternoon, and a funnel cloud was spotted in the next county. I was showing Sarah what the hook echo looked like on the NWS website, just before the radar portion of the site went down. So much for that real-time science lesson.
John and Rachel inspected the yard this afternoon. The new cherry tree is putting out buds, as are the rose bushes. And then there are the tulips. They are all up at least two inches high. These are tulips that are supposed to bloom in late April. At the rate things are growing, I will have tulips close to Easter.
All this has made me even grumpier about the climate change naysayers. Something is happening — and the change has happened very quickly in the last ten years or so. This is not the Minnesota weather of my childhood — or of the childhoods of my elders. There’s not alot I can do to change that. I do work to be more green, and frequently fail. But I try. I try to teach my girls to try, too.
At church lately we have been talking alot about our personal frustration with “being just one person that can’t make much impact”. The Margaret Mead quote about one person being the only thing that makes a difference gets used alot. It doesn’t help. But, we have recently realized that maybe if all us “just one” persons get together, maybe we can make an impact together. Now we are working to find ways to make that difference, together.
I don’t know if it will change things with the tulips and tornadoes. But at least I can say, I’m trying.